Bathroom Talk

One of the big differences between the East and the West is their opinions of the proper way to use a toilet. East of Istanbul, you will be using a squatter toilet. The bathrooms can get pretty disgusting. Take a look at these two gems, the concrete squatter coming from China and the porcelain one from Turkey.

One thing that I have not been able to come to grips with is the lack of toilet paper. Some bathrooms have a little hose that you are supposed to spray yourself clean with. In India, there is just a faucet and bucket in the stall. You are supposed to wipe with your left hand and then wash it off in the bucket. The left hand is ‘dirty’ and if you touch anybody with it or use it to eat it is extremely offensive. In Egypt many men had inch long finger nails on their left pinky finger for cleaning themselves. I try to be open minded, but this was just too much for me.

Many of my friends have really struggled with the squatters. Taylor says that his legs and ass muscles are so tight while he is trying to squat that it is physically impossible to go. I took great pleasure in heckling him from outside the stall while he was failing to get the job done. If you are on the balls of your feet, then everything gets tense. Like Fat Joe says, you gotta “Lean Back”. As long as you are on your heels, it’s all good.